Not Your Type
by Firerosemon
Summary: The adventures of Dakota and his lesbian best friend, Mia. [New drabble for every chapter, may or may not be continued]
1. Chapter 1

Dakota was doing what he usually did, besides surfing, which was flirting. Sometimes he paused to wonder why exactly he found himself unable to stop flirting but chalked it up as being part of the great mysteries of life. That was him bullshitting so he didn't have to contemplate it. He was just having fun after all.

Anyway, here he was, at one of the many spring break parties that had sprung up over the holidays. It was of course, very close to heaven to Dakota, as there were a lot of hot girls who seemed keen to have fun. Unfortunately his girl of the evening had left for some reason so his arms were empty of a woman. He was back to square one, which was approaching a girl and presenting himself as someone they would definitely like to leave with.

He saw her standing away from the general crowd of people, leaning against a wall with a cigarette in one hand. He was pretty sure it was impolite to smoke in a closed room but whatever. She almost seemed to blend in with the wall, drawing no real attention to herself. Dakota found himself pulled towards her as if she had suddenly shifted into being his center of gravity instead of the sun. It was probably the whole 'mystery' and 'loner' aspects that drew him towards her.

"Hey!" He greeted her, placing one hand on the wall near her head so he could lean over her. She seemed startled by his sudden appearance and by his large, almost over-eager smile.

"Hi." She returned his greeting, her voice low and raspy. She cleared her throat, eyeing him suspiciously. He was not deterred.

"So I saw you standing here all alone and thought you could use some company." He shrugged, appearing bashful.

She smirked at his excuse, looking amused for some reason.

"And what sort of company are you trying to supply, gent?" She mumbled under her breath.

"Hm?" Dakota pretended to be clueless, despite hearing every word she just said clearly. He raised his eyebrows, watching her shake her head and wave a hand in the air dismissively.

"Nothing." She said, taking another drag of her cigarette as if to avoid possible questioning. He didn't press it and she didn't seem to want to say anything either, so they stood there, listening to the music being blasted obnoxiously from the speakers. The most overplayed song of the year, as was the usual in parties like this.

He looked down at her, leaning back slightly as he could only see her blonde hair, not her face. He opened his mouth to speak, probably another horrendous pick up line as he didn't think before he talked, when she put a hand up to cut him off.

"I'm going to stop you right there before you take out your dick, or propose marriage to me or something-"

"Woah, a little arrogant there don't you think?" Dakota said wryly, though not without humour as it clear she was just joking.

"Well it did happen to me once before-" She watched his expression shift to disbelief, "No I'm kidding, don't worry."

"A sense of humour." He noted, finding himself smiling.

"I know exactly what you want." She nodded to herself, "I saw you only ten minutes ago with your tongue shoved down some girls throat."

"Been staring at me, have you?" Dakota quipped.

"I wasn't staring at you." She rolled her eyes, taking another puff of her cancer stick, and blowing out the smoke right into his face. He grimaced, practically feeling his life becoming shorter as he leaned back from her, removing his hand from the wall.

"Who were you staring at then?" It was his turn to roll his eyes, the question rhetorical in his mind.

"I was staring at the girl whose ass you were groping." She said it as if it were obvious, her gaze darting towards him as she watched his face for a reaction.

"Eh?" It took a few seconds for him to realise exactly what she was implying but before he could say anything, she spoke.

"So yeah, sorry mate but your muscles do nothing for me." She said apologetically, probably referring to how he'd unbuttoned his shirt so his abs would be revealed.

"Bummer." He shrugged after a moment, sounding clearly disappointed. He saw her shoulders slump slightly with relief as he displayed no other hostile reaction towards her confession.

She watched his dejected form for a while before reaching over and snubbing out her cigarette in a nearby ash tray.

"Come on." She sighed in a resigned way, grabbing his arm and tugging towards the direction of the crowd.

"What?" Dakota asked dumbly, eyebrows furrowing at the sudden action.

"_We're_," She emphasized the word, "Going to go pick up some girls."

His face changed, from dejected to the same eager look he had when he came over to her.

"Sweet!" He exclaimed, throwing one arm over her shoulder. She rolled her eyes at the action but didn't push it off.

"Hey wait, you never told me your name." He realised, looking at her expectantly.

She just shook her head, looking amused by the way he suddenly bounced back to being exuberant.

"Dumbass." She muttered, fighting a smile.


	2. Chapter 2

"Hot girls at three o'clock." Dakota heard Mia whisper from his right. He casually looked in the direction her head was tilted, seeing two girls standing by the bar, a drink in hand.

"Jackpot." He murmured in reply, feeling the corner of his lips quirk up into a smile.

"How should we approach them? Should I start singing gay bar by electric six?" Her lips twisted into a thoughtful frown.

Dakota couldn't stop the laugh that burst from him at that sentence.

"Pffft, that's coming on a bit too strong don't you think?" He turned towards her, grinning widely. She fought a smile, trying to look serious.

"Not if I do it a cappella." She dead panned.

"I don't think the queer national anthem will work here." He rolled his eyes.

"Isn't the queer national anthem a Lady Gaga song?" She asked, raising her eyebrow. He shook his head, not even knowing where to start with a question like that.

"Enough about that, we should go over before someone else does." He said impatiently.

"Right." She nodded to herself, digging around in her satchel for something. He eyed her, watching as she pulled out a pair of classy black sunglasses.

"Now we match." Mia declared, sliding them on before turning towards him. He smirked, slipping his own sunglasses down from where they were resting on top of his head.

"This way they can't tell exactly where we're looking." He explained, not sure if he had told her already. Probably, he knew her for a while now and he was way too fond of wearing sunglasses indoors, she must have been curious and asked at one point.

"You tricky bastard." She was staring at him, her mouth slightly open in disbelief. He hadn't told her before then. His bad.

He slid down his sunglasses for a moment so she could see him winking at her.

She shook her head, looking up towards the ceiling as if God had the answer to why Dakota was such a dumbass.

"Right, we have to go through the dance floor to get to them." Dakota instructed, gesturing to the crowd of inebriated people.

"Why can't we just go around?" Mia asked incredulously, stepping forward from where they were both leaning against the wall.

"If we came to a nightclub we might as well dance a little bit, don't you think?"

"I don't know why I'm friends with you sometimes."

"Because you're madly in love with me?"

"Grow some tits and we'll see."

"Rude!" Dakota laughed, moving into the throng of dancing people. She rolled her eyes, following him reluctantly.

"Dake! Come back here you shithead!" She yelled, seeing him disappear somewhere, way ahead of her. She got some looks but ignored them, used to getting looks whenever she was with Dakota. He couldn't control himself sometimes, she swore.

She found him after shoving some people out of the way, and going around a couple who seemed like they were intent on having sex on the dance floor.

He'd somehow found a girl to dance with and had his arms thrown over his head, looking like he was having the time of his life.

"Bloody hell, they just can't resist you can they?" She muttered, more to herself as he probably couldn't hear her over the music. It was louder here than in the corner they were hanging out in a moment ago.

"Come on, you fucking prick." She grabbed his arm, hauling him away from the tall redhead who had attached herself to him like a parasite.

"Woah, hey! I think she was my soulmate!" Dakota had to raise his voice to make himself heard over the music. She scoffed, all too used to his bullshit. He didn't fight against her pulling him towards where the two girls were though.

They made it to the other side of the dance floor only to find the two girls had vanished. Mia looked around, hoping to see they've just stood somewhere else but it seemed like they left.

"Fucking shit!" She swore, turning an accusing glare onto Dakota. He seemed vaguely apologetic as he saw the same thing she did.

"Aw well. I guess it just wasn't fate." He shrugged, shoving one hand into his pocket. She sighed, putting one hand onto her hip.

"C'mon, I think that redhead was up for anything." He rubbed her arm, trying to comfort her, "We can go see if we can find her again."

Mia rolled her eyes, shoving Dake. "Piss off."

He just laughed, knowing she wasn't really annoyed.

"Time for attempt two!" He announced.

Mia groaned loudly.


	3. Chapter 3

**a/n: dakota going into the dressing room was problematic and i'm not excusing his behavior**

* * *

><p>"Wait, pause." Mia said suddenly, cutting him off on his long retelling of his adventures in Sweet Amoris.<p>

"What?" Dakota asked from where he was lying back on her bed, lifting his head to look at where she was sitting on the floor, painting her toenails black.

"You walked in on her changing?" Mia questioned incredulously, hoping that she heard wrong.

"Yeah." Dakota sighed, letting his head drop down onto the bed again.

"Are you serious?" She gaped at him, apparently lost for words.

"Yeah, I know." Was all he said, throwing his arm over his face.

"Wow. I knew you were stupid sometimes but this…" Her mouth twisted into a frown, still wordless.

"If it makes you feel better she gave me a black eye." He offered.

"Ah. I thought there was something weird about your face." She smirked as she said this.

"I know what you're going to say, something about it being weirder than usual." Dakota rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah but wait. Did she say you come in?"

"Well, no."

"Then why did you go in?"

Dakota didn't reply, having no real justifiable reason other than well, _being_ Dakota.

"Well was she still angry after?" Mia continued to ask after it was clear Dakota wasn't going to say anything.

"Well when I went to her school's open house she wasn't mad anymore-"

"You went to her school?" Mia had apparently abandoned the task of painting her nails completely as she interrupted him. "…You must really like her, huh?" She was staring at him with an odd considering look on her face, her elbows resting on her knees. Dakota felt as if she were staring at his soul.

"…What?" He asked after a moment of uncomfortable silence, looking to the side as if she would see something undesirable if she looked in his eyes.

She started grinning, self satisfaction practically leaking from her pores.

"You've got a crush." She didn't seem able to wipe her grin away.

"No way, I just went to see my uncle." He rolled his eyes, trying to shrug off how her words struck something in him.

"I know you, you can't lie to me." Mia countered, having stopped looking so smug except for a small smile.

"Whatever. Are we going to the beach today?" Dakota, obviously uncomfortable with the idea of being romantically attached, tried to change the subject.

"Pfft." Mia allowed it, raising her eyebrows briefly at the obvious deflection. "No thanks, I'll burn to a crisp."

"I'll never understand how you're so pale in _Australia_ of all places." He marveled idly, something he'd said a few times before.

"Ancient Goth secret." She replied as she usually did, rolling her eyes.

"It's weird." Dakota mumbled, having nothing to do other than stare at the band posters on her wall.

"Yeah, yeah, Mr. Fake Tan freak-"

"-It's real!" He interjected loudly. "I can prove it!" He sat up slightly as if he were going to rip his shirt off then and there.

"Calm down, Jacob." She rolled her eyes, having sensed what he was about to do. "Tell me about how your uncle was."

Dakota relaxed onto the bed again, a smile lighting up his face at the mention of Boris.

"Oh he was _great_-"

Dakota talked for so long that Mia managed two extra coats of nail polish, including lengthy drying time in between coats.


End file.
